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Adoption Stories

Below are some real stories of real people who have been impacted through our adoption programs. Click on their names to read how we are helping make a difference in their lives.

 


INFANT ADOPTION STORIES


The Evans Story

My parents divorced when I was 2.  By age 6, both of my parents had re-married.  I lived with one family and spent summers and holidays with the other.  It wasn't my best-case scenario, but it was my reality. 
 
I never looked at my stepparents differently; they were simply more parents, calling them all mom and dad, each with a different perspective to share with me.  At our wedding rehearsal cookout, I shared with them what I felt were the unique lessons I'd learned from each of them--explaining I couldn't have become who I was without each of them.  It was a healing moment for me, a culmination of pain and hurt turned to determination and respect. 
 
It's funny how life circles back around when you're not looking.  Years later, my husband and I would adopt our first child, a daughter, and I would be faced with a new family--another unique, unexpected one.
 
When we were given the choice of open, semi-open, or closed adoption, I immediately drew from my own experience as a child of divorce.  If I flourished with the love of more family, I knew my child could, too.  And while the situation was not exactly parallel, it was, for me, hauntingly similar--an opportunity to find love and relationship with unexpected people. 
 
So open adoption was never a reach for me.  It was a natural addition to our growing family.  And it worked.  Beautifully. 
 
It's no surprise that adoption creates lifelong wounds for all members of the adoption triad--child, birth family, and adoptive family.  One family must break for another to be created.  And in the middle, a child.  But open adoption allows immediate healing to begin.  It carves a path for the honest truth, for which there is no substitute.  It opens doors to conversations that can answer difficult questions.  And most importantly, open adoption creates a relationship between two families who share a deep love for a child.  And what could possibly be wrong with that? 
 
A few weeks before our daughter was born, while shopping at a local craft store, I saw a small wall plaque with pink and green ribbons and carved metal hearts.  It read, 'love grows when shared.'  I stood in the aisle and cried for the hurt I knew we would all experience in the coming months and years, hopeful that an open adoption would heal our wounds.  I bought two plaques that day, one for our daughter's nursery and one for her birth mom.
 
Without a doubt, the open adoption we agreed to so many years ago has flourished and given our sweet daughter the very best of her broken beginning.  10 years later, because we share, love continues to grow.  Indeed, it does.

The Gregory Family

"7 years ago when our adoption journey began, we never could have imagined that not only would we be blessed with 3 beautiful children but also an extended family that now includes our birth families; moms, dads, aunts, uncles, and grandparents too.  D.A. Blodgett - St. John's has been there to facilitate and support us through all 3 of our adoptions.  Our caseworkers and the pregnancy counselors we worked with made the process seamless.  We are so thankful that we chose D.A. Blodgett-St. John's."

 

 

 


The Blumenstein Family

"You'll never hear us say we couldn't love our daughter more even if she was ours; she was ours the moment we hear her heart beat, she was ours the first time we saw her on ultrasound, she was ours the minute I was the first to hold her at birth, we love her because she IS ours and DABSJ made that possible."

 

 

 

 


Jeremy and Danielle's Story

When we decided to grow our family through adoption, we talked to several different organizations before choosing to work with D.A. Blodgett - St. John's. They were reassuring during the intensity of the home study process, knowledgeable about the processes of adoption, and tactful in their communication of birthparent information. After our daughter came home, we relied on our case workers to help us navigate some challenging situations that were completely new and unfamiliar to us. They did so with grace and professionalism, while helping us to begin and nurture an open adoption, and we are grateful for their support along the way.

 

 


The Miller Family

"We feel DA Blodgett's infant adoption program is one of the best in the area for treating both adoptive parents and parents considering adoption for their child with respect and meeting everyone's needs."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


SNAP ADOPTION STORIES


Lori & Brad's Story
One in four Americans say they have considered becoming foster or adoptive parents, but fewer than one in 500 ever act on that impulse. With so many adults thinking about it, and with such a huge need in the child welfare system, why don’t more adults actually become foster parents?

That question weighs heavily on the minds of Lori and Brad, a couple living in suburban Grand Rapids. They are parents of three biological daughters, now adults, four young adopted children, and an infant daughter with special needs they are currently fostering. Besides being busy and devoted parents, Lori says they often find themselves “crawling up on our soapboxes” to convince other couples to become foster parents.

Lori grew up in a large blended family in Kentwood. As a young girl, she was fascinated by a foster mother in her church “who always had a baby in her arms.” When she married Brad 26 years ago, they started their family the traditional way. Mothering came easily to Lori, but her pregnancies were difficult and all three girls were born prematurely. “When my obstetrician refused to deliver any more of my babies, I thought about that lady in my church,” Lori says.

Brad, who is employed outside the home, was happy to become a foster dad and says he’s an expert at “holding babies.” Over the last ten years he and Lori have fostered more than 40 children and have adopted four of them: Sam, age 10, Mackenzie, 9, Ashley, 4 and Alexis 22 months. Brad is serious when he talks about the need for more foster families. “I know a lot of people who would make great foster parents. But they reject the idea for the wrong reasons,” he says.

“People remember the horror stories of birth parents who demand their child back. That has not been our experience at all,” says Brad. “Our case workers at D.A. Blodgett - St. John’s are always very clear about whether a foster child is available for adoption. They are very careful. You know what’s going in with every child you take into your home.”

People are also fearful of adopting a child because of physical or emotional problems a child might have, Lori says. “When you adopt a child through D.A. Blodgett - St. John’s the case worker requires you to read the entire case file,” says Lori. “They want you to know everything there is to know about this child."

In most cases the foster placement is temporary and the children are eventually returned to their biological parents. However, if children become available for adoption, they are often adopted by their foster parents. This was the case with four of Brad and Lori’s children.

Brad wonders why more families don’t foster and adopt. “The process is simpler, faster and less costly than an international adoption, and it helps children in this community,” he says. “Becoming a foster parent typically takes three to five months, and families receive a stipend to help cover the child’s expenses.”

“We talked to a lot of agencies before choosing D.A. Blodgett - St. John’s,” Lori adds. “We’ve loved every single worker from D.A. Blodgett - St. John’s. They listen to our needs. They visit us and the kids at least once a month and we talk on the phone or chat by email every three to four days.”

Mary Lou Bomgaars, a Supervisor in the Department for Foster Care Licensing is happy to have this couple in the program. “Parenting is a passion for Lori and Brad. They are very hands on. Lori is very thoughtful and intentional about being a mom. She is on our Foster Parent Advisory Council and helps to train new foster parents.”

Despite all of Lori’s skill and experience, she still welcomes the support she gets for her growing family. “When you become a foster parent, you aren’t alone. There’s a big network of case workers and other foster parents. We support each other.”